Who Am I?

Have you ever found yourself wandering through life, wondering exactly who you are supposed to be? What is my importance? Why am I here? I think as adults, we all eventually face this question. The routine life seems to wear thin on us over the years; from grade school, to jobs, to daily familial duties. This cycle seems to go round and round and never ends! I remember tabloids covering an interview with Jaden and Willow Smith. You know- Will and Jada's kids. Willow had reiterated how she'd gone to school for one year of her life. It was bitter sweet because, finally, she had learned why children were always so depressed. Yet, now she was depressed.

The routine lifestyle is NOT for everyone; especially me! I can do the same tasks, but there must be something intriguing about it. We long for shock, excitement, adventure, challenge, stimulation, etc... This is a natural yearning that our souls require from time to time.

I've noticed I may fear that I perhaps need to be that person that I mock or discreetly antagonize in some ways. The things that I perceived as so annoying, cumbersome and menial need to become ingrained within my lifestyle. I need to research more things, speak out with passion regarding that which holds importance to me, care about preventative health methods, ask more, do more and set higher standards for myself. My discipline needs improvement.

Sometimes I discover that I am surrounded by a sadness and a feeling of being incomplete and underwhelmed with my circumstances. I get lost in fantasies of envisioning myself as I wish to be and remembering as a child what I thought I'd be at this point in life. My imagination is great; probably one of the best out here. Yet, my will to be proactive and organized and driven toward meeting objectives is highly underdeveloped in my opinion.

A good thing is that two of my strengths are self-analysis and honesty: I find it helpful to go back in time and discover which realities about my life have come together to make me the person that I am today. I need to understand why I am who I am in order to overcome and rewire the very thinking which forms me. I do this because there are some aspects of myself that I must change in order to grow. This task is both scary and interesting at the same time!

I can go back and remember exact phrases that were stated; listen to the conversations around me that were impressionable on behavior and views. From those memories, I can better understand my current actions, habits and beliefs. Then, I can assess whether or not I am behaving counterproductive toward my goals and objectives in life.

I am constantly learning about myself: Who am I? What fires me up? How do I want to live? I hope you become or remain your biggest paparazzi fan! What do you know about you?

Best wishes to you and your happily balanced estate!